trust

I'm listening to a sermon a good friend of me gave, and I thought I might post a note about trust I posted on facebook a couple of month ago

Psalm 28:7
7 The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and I am helped. My heart leaps for joy and I will give thanks to him in song.

You always need someone to trust! For a lot of people it's hard to trust if it's into other people, things, systems or God.I can't write a lot about others trusting God because it has to be a decision that everyone has to take themselves, we can support and help a person that thinks of trusting God and accepting jesus as their savior, but we can never push people to do what they don't want to do. It's also a part of trusting someone when you don't make them do sth, if you trust them to do the right thing. For some people it's hard to trust other people, especially those they just met. Some of them got hurt and are just afraid; they build an invisible wall around them and only some people are able to break through those. The worst thing that can happen than is if someone breaks that trust, once you're hurt it's even harder to trust. In those moments it's important to have at least always one person you can trust. In my case: God! he is my Lord and savior and I'm always gonna be able to trust the Lord.
haha, i just remembered a sheet of paper i got from my exchange organisation before i left, it was talking about going back to your home country. The one thing i now remembered was the reverse culture shock, it means that you have problems to find back into your home, especially because of the glorifications you do in the country you were. i don#t know if i really have that, but i now realize that my life here wasn' as amazing as i always thought. I already experienced a lot of suprises, positive and negative. But now back to my topic: trust
I'm a very open and friendly person, at least that's what i think, and i LOVE meeting new people, but thinking abou this topic, just a while ago( to be specific yesterday), i realized that i need to be more careful who i trust. some people you think would be understanding maybe aren't what you think, like i said the glorification of the things and people in your homecountry.
But as many problems i might have, as many people might hurt me, as many things will go wrong. i can always trust into my LORD!

Psalm 9:9-10

9 The LORD is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble.
10 Those who know your name will trust in you, for you, LORD, have never forsaken those who seek you.

Warriors of light

Hey there,
this sunday i got ask to talk about the light in my life and how i am a light. It's gonna be some kind of testimony i have to give during a sunday youth service in two weeks.
There is this song called 'Krieger des Lichts' (eng.warriors of light) by Silbermond, a german band. It talks about fighting for what we stand, fighting for what's important. I personally really like this song and it's also gonna be the theme for that specific service. I still don't know why they chose two friends and me, but I can say that I'm truly honored to be seen as one of those warriors. So here are some thoughts we collected and I had about it:

Warriors! They stand for strength, strong will power, couragous and never ending faith. All things, I would say are positive. But it also includes the word war, a word I associate with something really, really negative. But not included in the word warrior, at least not for me. Because life is kind of like a little war. we have to fight every day, every hour against all the temptations and a lot of people just run, but a warrior stays and fights for what he stands for.

Light! something bright, nice and warm. Don't we all love the shine of some candles or the warming power of fire?
Now how can you combine those two? I think it's pretty easy! The light isn't only what we see, it's what we give. It's praying for someone, hugging and being there for someone when they need you, giving love, bringing God, our Lord and father to other people, giving HIS love and HIS hope to others. Showing God through ourselves.I know it sounds hard to do that but in little aspects we all are warriors of light sometimes.

In Germany, a lot of people say that the youth of today doesn't believe in God, that there is nobody who fights for God who is my age. But that's not true. I see it everyday at my school, we don't have a lot of people believe in Christ; they don't go to church or to prayers or stuff like that, they are in the darkness. But we also have people who fight for bringing back that light into my school, who fight for showing how God is using us. God made everysingle one of us to be a warrior of light, to bring his light into the world. maybe you organize a taizé prayer in your school to bring that light or maybe you just help someone who needs it.

We all are warriors of light! I am! You are! We all are!

Some thougths

So, I had this bible study on Monday and i was going through my bible and found this passage and thought I should share it. It's a great chapter that talks about Love, which is a big deal for a lot of my friends right now.

1 Corinthians 13
 ¹ If I speak in the tongues^[a] of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. ² If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. ³ If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast,^[b] but do not have love, I gain nothing.
 ⁴ Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵ It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶ Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
 ⁸ Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. ⁹ For we know in part and we prophesy in part, ¹⁰ but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. ¹¹ When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. ¹² For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.
 ¹³ And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

So never forget, God loves us like we are and we don't have to change. And if we don't have to change for him we don't have to change for anyone else, because we live for him! And he accepts us as we are.

A Week in Taizé

Taizé is a little place in Burgundy; France! it's the home of a christian community, with prayers that are uniqe in their way. so that's where i was last week. I went there not expecting what i actually got. I thought it's gonna be this fun week where i meet new people and just be away from everything; I got so much more!

Of course I met all these great, amazing people and brothers there but i got something that meant so much more to me than anything else. I got time for myself, thinking about everything that's bothering me; bringing it before God. I started this great relationship with Jesus, cause he is my anchor! i got all these concerns and doubts over the week, especially after i was in silence, but he was always there. i found this this great bible verse in John 14. 'Don't let your hearts be troubled, trust in God; trust in me' (John 14:1). it just totally is what we have to do, how we can survive all the doubts, and negatives in our lives. We need to trust that all these negatives happen for a reason, that they happen for a cause. I know it's hard to believe sometimes, but God is always there and he's never gonna leave, no matter what!
If we live our lives like jesus or even other people like frere Roger, trusting in the Lord, trusting in his Love it's so much easier. we shouldn't let all teh negative stuff get too big for us, overwheling us but react with Love; maybe even with joy?!
Don't let your hearts be troubled, trust in God; trust in me!
I simply love this verse! it sais to just accept, I don't mean that you shouldn't grief or be sad, but that you should trust in God to make it better, to help you through this; cause god is Great!!!!!!!

So i got all this in just one week of simplicity, prayer and Love! I mean what more do you want. I'm so excited to have a huge taize prayer in my hometown soon, it gives so much strength to get through my life having them in there.

Okay guys, so if anyone is actually reading this and thinking maybe i should try this taize thing, or even finding a connection with God. maybe taize is a good beginning, and maybe you can just google if there is a prayer close to you and maybe we even see each other in Taizé sometimes ;)

First days of school

Sometimes things happen that you don't expect to. School is sooo much better than i first thought it would be.
When i first went to school i was so nervous to not get what they want from me, that I don't find anybody besides my best friend to talk to. But than, i think it was God, something or somebody worked it all out I'm good with the teachers even though i thought it's gonna be aweful from what i've heard and than I made myself a promise, to work as hard as i can and do everything in my power to reach my goal: Med school.
Okay, i know it sounds silly and i don't really know why i want to become a doctor but it's my dream since probably fourth grade
During my practical work experience one of the doctors asked me: CHrissi what do you want to become ? I was like : a surgeon! He: do you have any friends or family that are doctors Me: No He: that's weird!

So yeah, i wanna become a doctor for like forever and i never thought that it would get that important that soon, but I'm ready to get on it.ready to start fighting for my dream.
Well, at least I'm gonna start with trying to get good grades from now on, to get a good abitur and than to get a place to study.

Yeah i know God has a plan for me. I hope it's gonna be that I'llbecome a doctor; if not I'm fine with that but I'm not gonna give up very easily

time

Time

Time goes fast
Time goes slow

Time sees people die

Time sees the grass grow

Time does not forget
Time does not forgive

Time crushes and kills

Time takes all you have to give

Time rushes past

Time ticks and tocks

Time is shown by the sun

Time is on the kitchen clock
Time is going slowly
Time tells you what must be done

Time is running out
Time waits for you to have fun
Time is impatient
Time is kind
Time is cruel
Time doesn't mind
Time is a second
Time is forever
Time is right this minute
Time is now or never

by Amy Darnbrook

This weekend i was gone with my worship band, to practice for our first CD, for that i looked for some texts to make them think a little, but actually it just made me think.
Especially because there is this one person in my life, i know that is alwayson the go, never there even though he is the one who should be listening, helping and caring, but how is that possible if he's not there, if he's always gone.
In this time, this generation we always have to be on the go, everything has to go fast, fast, fast and it doesn't matter if you loose someone on the way.
So just think how important time is in our lives, just think about how often you use time realted words, sentences or questions....
here an example for a normal conversation i have sometimes:
me:hey, how are you doing
friend: ok, a little stress but fine
me: wanna meet?
friend: sorry, but i don't really have time

if these would be 4 texts, 3 out of them are time related.
Still the worst thing you could do is to get yourself stressed because you don't have time. I mean i would be the first one if it would be possible to buy time, but i can't, you can't nobody can.

So yeah, time is something really, really precious and we have to be careful with it, use it wisely but don't try to fit everything in cause than you can't enjoy it; to say it with my favorite words:
CHILL

Loooooooooooooooooooove Chrissi

My life the (Anti-)trinity

Trinity: Three people as one. God is the father, son and holy spirit!

When i thought about going back to school i started thinking about how it's like to go back to school, how i have to go back to person i have to bei when i'm in school; and i started thinking.

What kind of person am, and the thing is i couldn't define it as one person, it is like i have three kind of characters, depending on where i am.

When I'm school, i'm this introverted, not liked but still somewhat smart girl, that sometimes is a nerd. I don't laugh a lot, don't like attention and try to keep everything with myself.

When I'm with my best friends, I'm the complete opposite; extroverted, funny, have fun, party, not the typical daddy's girl. I can show my emotions and am happy with that. I love my friends!!!

When I'm with my church, the crux or my friends from that group I'm a very relaxed person, sometimes at least, but I still can have discussions with those people i can't with my friends. I act older, i still party but I'm very relaxed as well cause i can show my love and relationship to God.

Sometimes I wish that I could combine my life, make three to one. But I don't know how it could work, it's a trinity that isn't right, a trinity that doesn't work, a trinity that's never gonna become one.
Yeah, so my life is an antitrinity, but i really like it, because i think that noone could handle one of my lifes they don't know, so i really think it's good how it is.

Now i'm ready to go, to school, to my friends, my church and my life :D

holiday stress

every third saturday of the month there is something called nightfever in the cologne cathedral; this saturday was my first time. After going to the FC Köln game my friend told me i should check it out, since it has similarities to taize; so i did. It's a time to think and talk to God, but than there is a catechesis from the city priest, i kinda know so i did that as well, and he talked about holiday stress, that's how i got the title for this post.
I can really relate to what he said there about that people make themselves a lot of stress even though it should be time to relax.
While i was in america, and after i was on my east coast trip i just chilled, relaxed in the pool or hung out with my friends, but here? back in germany? Since I'm here i'm always on the run, if it's spain, britain or a band camp. I seriously spent 5 days or less at home in the one month I'm back, is that normal? I mean i need the stress, i need being on the run and i couldn't stand being home more than an hour with nothing to do, but that is not only my problem, it is a problem so many people have; they can't relax.
God is always there but why can't we listen? why can't we listen to what he is saying to us. Because we're running all the time, listening to music having ear phones with noise isolation already says everything. when we wear those ear phones we wanna block out everything qnd concentrate on ourselves I just wish for all of us that we can start listen, that we can get into a deeper relationship with us.

Well, i think i'm getting sick :( bust still, I'm gonna go on. hihi ok so this saturday was the first game of my soccer club 1.FC Köln. it was a packed stadium and i thought i could go with alllllll the other fans, standing there having a good time but than i had to go somewhere else because of this stupid crutch, it sucked, or at least that's what i thought :D i got a seat right at the mid field line in the first row; we called it the cripple row because that's where they send the ones with crutches :D haha, it was really cool!!!

so i really don't know what to write anymore!
So have a good day, night whatsoever and remember: GOD LOVES YA!

Your Chrissay

Another day in a normal life

I don't know what's going on right now, last night or better this morning, i was awake until about 5.30 - 6 am!!! i mean i wanna sleep, but i can't. There is no reason for me to be nervous or anything, i just can't seem to fall asleep.

Than after finally sleeping for a couple of hours i got a call from my dad; that's when i recognized that i was suppose to take a bus about 20 minutes ago :s DAMN it ! late once again! well, at the end it wasn't even too bad cause i was only 20 minutes late, but still, i don't like being late it just makes me feel bad.

The friend i met with is one of my church frinds, a really nice and loving girl, a friend you can REALLY ;) talk to. we made this really weird noodles that were calle 'priest strangler' i don't know why, but we thought it would be funny. =D So we talked a lot, like girls do it, so really nothing special!
Than we started watching worship videos on youtube, it gave her goosbumps and that makes me feel so good, to see how God is working to one of my favorite ways ever: music! It reminded me of Psalm 98, where it's about how music is there to worship our God! 

But still, after meeting with my first friend I went to see one of my best friends because she is going on vacation tomorrow, so it was clear that i had to see her. i don't know what happened there, but she was in a really weird mood, that made me feel kinda happy because she was it.

While we are talking about friends; friendship is one of the most important things, Albert Schweizer once said: "In everyone's life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit."
That really hits it, I mean what would the world be without friends? For me it would be like a rainbow without colors, a bird without wings, music without sound, church without God! I couldn't live without it, my friends are always there for me and i hope I am as good of a friend than they are to me?! I often ask myself the question how do i deserve this love? why do i get these amazing people in my life? And there is only one answer to these questions, well actually two.
1. i don't know, I really don't know, I mean I'm a pretty messed up person and I'm pretty sure it's not really easy with me.
2. Because we have a mighty, loving and forgiving God, he knows exactly what I need, and who I need.

As you can see I really am just a normal teenager, with normal feelings and normal thoughts, but still I think I'm a special and uniqe person, because I'm made in the look of God and please, that makes everybody the most special and precious thing.

haha, I just can't stay with on one topic, it's probably really hard to read or at least understand it. So yeah, I'm sorry for that but I hope you still enjoy it

=D

My first post

I don't know why I just decided to start blogging now, maybe it's because i just want to write down stuff i have in my head, maybe to tell what's going on.
It's not gonna be one of those fancy blogs you can find sometimes, it's just gonna be a simple blog about a simple life; my life!

My life really is simple, I'm a regular student, who likes makinng and listening to music, meeting friends and isn't to happy about everything that has to do with school ;). so really nothing special, just a life that is as normal as the life of every other average student.

Today I met with two friends, first one of my friends came over and we just hung around and chilled. than i met with my best friend to drink a coffee and we took a stroll and talked, it was so good talking to her. i kinda miss talks about christ though. In america i had a lot of people i could talk about it but it's so hard to find a person like that here.
Right now I'm listening to K- Love, a radio station with contemporary christian music, just listen to what they are singing is so encouraging, but what helps even more is seeing how my friends are becoming, how they grow in God, how they grow as persons, it's just amazing what God has in storage for us.
Okay so it's 0.21 right now and I'm still way to awake to go to bed, i just have this power right now, the want to talk about jesus. well i think it has to wait cause there is noone online anymore :D
Good night world,
good night first blogging experience :D